wedding planning
Marriage Proposals – Make It Special + Memorable
This evening while commuting back home from my college teaching gig, I chatted with my grandmother who I love and adore with all of my heart. We talk about a lot of things, but tonight we got on the topic of marriage and for the first time she told me about when my grandfather proposed to her decades ago.
Surprisingly, I never knew all of the details, but she was able to recall every single detail of that day when he proposed to her. What stood out to me as I listened to her, was the excitement I could hear in her voice over the phone as she remembered and recalled that very special moment in her life. My grandmother is in her late seventies and if my grandfather were still here with us (he passed away in 2004), they would have been married for over fifty years.
The fact that my grandmother remembered the details of her proposal as if it had just happen yesterday, including how my grandfather asked for her hand in marriage beforehand, to the way he genuinely and lovingly expressed to her that he wanted to marry and start a family with her (they had seven children, including twins), and how she felt at the moment was such a beautiful story for me to hear. In fact, it was pure joy in my soul. Clearly, I’m in love with being in love.
What’s my point?
I want to remind you guys who are thinking about popping the question to make sure it is a very special moment for the both you, a moment that you will someday share with your grandchildren and maybe even great-grandchildren. Ask yourself, will she (as well as you) feel just as excited 30, 40, 50, or even 60 years from now when she recalls and shares with her grandchildren how you proposed to her?
Get Inspired!
Photo Credit: Ron Bowen Photography
Read MoreFive Tips for Wedding Vendor Contracts
I initially posted these five bits of advice about hiring wedding vendors and signing service agreements back in April 2009, but I wanted to republish them for all of you recently engaged brides.
- Get it in writing! Before you pay a retainer or non-refundable deposit to any vendor for wedding services, it is imperative that you have all arrangements in writing in the form of a service agreement, signed by both you and the respective vendor. Never ever, pay a retainer to a vendor without a contract. If they do not have a service agreement for you to sign and you want to hire them, and then draw up your own written service agreement.
- Do not sign a contract until you have read every line. You absolutely should read every service agreement you sign to make sure you understand the vendor’s terms and conditions for services. If there is something that you do not agree to, then by all means let the vendor know to see if you can come to a mutually agreed upon term. This is not to say that a vendor should rewrite his or her entire contract for you because this is not likely to happen because contracts are designed to cover and protect the parties involved.
- Review all vendor contracts. Every vendor contract should at least include the following: your event date, the start and end times, including set up time, a cancellation policy and a service description including any custom details or special requests that you discussed. In addition, the contract should have both a fee and payment schedule. The fee schedule should clearly outline what is included in the base or quoted price, the price of any additional services if you requested any, and the cost of overtime should your event go over the amount of hours included in the service. The payment schedule should include your retainer, which is due at the time of signing the contract and it should clearly outline the due dates of remaining payments.
- Pay with a credit card. If possible, pay for vendor services with a credit card. In this way, if there is a problem and you think in full conscious that you deserve a refund for services and the vendor denies you a refund, you will have a much better chance of obtaining that refund than if you had paid with cash or check because you can file a claim with your credit card company. Another benefit to using a credit is that you can earn points, for example, for air mileage and in some cases, cash-back and this may help you pay for your honeymoon. Please note that when I say pay with a credit card, I am not saying use your credit cards to finance your wedding as in get in debt.
- Go with your gut instincts. If it is something that does not sit well with you about a vendor and or his contract, then by all means trust your instincts and locate someone else to provide that service for you.
Should your wedding planner sign your vendor contracts? Get the answer by clicking here.
Photo: Quick Purchase
*Also republished in January 2010
Wedding Wisdom: Brides, Always Honor Your Mothers
Whether your mother is contributing to your wedding costs or not, let her have a bit of “say so” about a few things. Chances are she too has dreamed about your wedding day from the day the doctor said to her, “It’s a girl.” And definitely, from the moment she learned that you were engaged to be married.
Now, I am not saying that you should compromise your vision or on the things that really matter to you and your fiancé, rather that you should take into consideration what your mother has to say. Planning a wedding should a be a joyous time for the both of you, not an event that will lead to an estranged relationship.
My opinion is this…you mother had you, raised you, and I am certain she has your best interests at heart. So, please value her, never disrespect her, and it is smart to include her in some aspects of your wedding planning. At the end of the day, I am certain that she will always be your number one advocate.
Happy Planning!
Photo from Cafe Press
Read MoreWhen to Use Admission Cards
An admission card is an invitation enclosure that admits your guests into your wedding or other related social event.
The most common situation in which you would use an admission card is if you are hosting an exclusive event at a historic landmark that attracts tourists, for example a famous cathedral.
Another situation in which you may include an admission card in your invitation set is if your event location requires you to do so in order to host an event on their property. This is not uncommon if you are hosting a wedding or social event at a private estate and often times, in this situation you will also be required to hire security.
Finally, high-profile clients, for example celebrity weddings, also use admission cards. Therefore, unless you are a celebrity or hosting your event at a venue where tourists tend to congregate, an admission card is not necessary.
Do you have any wedding planning related questions? If so, please feel free to comment below and I will answer them.
*Originally published in July 2009
Image from Invitation Consultants
Read MoreWinter Wedding? Please Check Your Guests’ Coats!
Are you hosting a late fall or winter wedding or other social event this winter season?
If so, please consider providing your guests with a coat check service. If your guests are anything like me, they do not like dragging around their winter coats. And hence, they will greatly appreciate knowing their coats are in secure place and not having to worry about them until the end of the your wedding.
Another plus of having your wedding guests’ coats checked is that you will not have to worry about hanging over the back of your beautiful specialty chair covers. You know…the ones that you just spend a load of money on as part of your event design.
Think about it! Do you really want photographs of your event design with big winter coats falling off the back of your chair covers?
I did not think you would, so keep them out of sight.
Things You Will Need to Check Coats at Your Wedding:
- Coat Check Attendants – You will need at least two attendants to check your wedding guest’s coats. The larger your guests lists, the more coat attendants you will need. If you hired a wedding planner and I hope you did at least to manage your event logistics, then s/he should be able to supply a couple of event assistants to do this for a nominal fee.
- Cost Rack and Hangers - Obviously, you will need a place at the venue to hang and store your wedding guests’ coats. If you are getting married at a hotel, check with them to see if they provide this service or if they at least have the garment racks and hangers that you can use to check coats. If not locate a place to rent them. Another option, if there is a coat check service agency in your area, is to hire them for your wedding.
- Coat Check Tags – The coat tags are a necessity because at the end of the night, it will be easy for the coat attendants to retrieve your guest’s coats. Part of the coat tag goes on wedding guests’ coat hanger and the bottom portion of the coat tag is given to them. Therefore, all they will have to do is to present their portion of the coat tag when they are ready to retrieve their coats.
Again, keep them out of sight!!
Photo Source: Admit One Products
*Originally posted November 2008.
Read MoreMaid or Matron of Honor?
What is the difference?
The only difference between the two is that a maid of honor is an unmarried attendant. Whereas, a matron of honor is a married attendant and both can be thought of as your lead bridesmaid.
Do you have to have both?
No, it is completely up to you. However, if you want both a maid and matron of honor, you can have both. In this situation, the maid of honor’s role takes precedence during wedding ceremony (i.e. arranging your veil, holding your bouquet, and signing your marriage license). However, it is perfectly find for them both to share responsibilities like planning your bachelorette party or bridal shower together; and they can each share duties on your wedding day.
FYI: Did you know that an “honor attendant” is when a bride has a male as her lead attendant instead of a maid or matron of honor; or when a groom has a female in lieu of a best man?
*Originally published in May 2009 (content has been modified).
Read MoreDestination Weddings – Choosing the Location
The process of choosing a location for your destination wedding is similar to choosing a honeymoon destination. Following, I have outlined a few things you need to determine when deciding on your destination wedding location.
How far do you want to travel?
A destination wedding can take place internationally or domestically. In other words, the term “destination wedding” does not necessarily mean you have to travel outside the country. In fact, your ideal destination may not even require you to leave your state.
Of course, if you decide you want to travel abroad, then the possibility of places to host your wedding is plenteous and this is where a destination wedding specialist in your locale can educate you and help you narrow down your choices as to the best destinations to host your wedding based on the following:
What type of setting do you envision for your wedding?
By figuring out the type of setting you envision for your wedding and the specific things you want to see and do, you and your destination wedding planner can narrow down a list of potential places to host your destination wedding. For example, if your widest dream is to get married underwater in the beautiful waters of the Caribbean, your destination wedding specialist can tell you exactly where that is possible and the requirements for such an adventurous wedding.
As for the things you want to see and do, think about activities or shared hobbies you both enjoy the most—surfing, scuba diving, golf, snorkeling, skiing, hiking, spa vacations, etc.? Next, can you imagine not enjoying these things on your destination wedding vacation? By coming to a consensus of the things you both want to see and do, you and your destination wedding planner can further narrow down your options in the land of infinite possibilities.
How many attendants and guests are you planning to invite?
The size of your wedding is very important because it will determine what locations can accommodate your event. The average number of guests that attend a destination wedding is a slightly less than 50. It could be that you already have a specific place in mine. However, if you have a large guest list, the location may not be able to accommodate your wedding size. The rule of thumb with hosting a destination wedding is “less is more”. Destination weddings are often intended to be more intimate than the traditional wedding, in that it primarily comprises of only your closest family and friends.
The questions I have outlined are just a few things for you to determine that will help you narrow down the options of where to have your destination wedding. There are other things to you need to take into consideration that will help you narrow down your options, such as whether you want a religious or civil ceremony.
I will talk more about this in Monday’s blog post. Stay tuned by subscribing to my blog!
{This is a re-post and content has been modified. Originally published on my old blog in 2009}
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